Friday, June 10, 2011
Loneliness is it a state of mind?
It's funny to me the longer we're here in Florida the more i find I keep looking at things that use to make me smile and laugh like i did as a kid. I find that I'm going on netflix and finding cartoon's and TV shows I use to watch, I do sometimes wonder if I'm doing this as a way to cope with my loneliness so that I can take it one moment at a time so I can deal with it in away that will allow me to not be over whelmed at any moment.
One thing I wish is that I knew someone who had already gone through this however I have to understand that everyone story is different and because of that, someone else who may have moved out here to east from west coast will not be going through the same things as I am.
Now what is funny is even though Pookie and I are both going through this at the same time, to tell the truth we are not, because he has a 2 month head start at understanding the different rules we now live under to a certain degree. I find now I have a certain amount of anger at times towards pookie even though I'm the one who told him to take this chance and go for it. I guess because I have no friends per say yet it makes it harder for me at times to understand what my new life has to offer and allow my self to step out of the fear and embrace this for what it is. The adventure of a life time.
the funny thing is as we get older we sometimes I believe thing that out time for adventure is over, I mean why not when we get a certain age were suppose to be settled and boring or so it seems, but why I bough in to this image is beyond me I mean what's wrong with making my own rules as we go along and decided for our self's what works and what does not work for us.. I
I know that dreams don't really die they do change and what my dreams's are now becoming I'm not 100% sure of however I do know this. I am very excited to ride the wave now just have to see were it takes me...:)